Home

We're finally unpacked, laundry is done and the house is in order. Just in time for these two to come back!

The friend who adopted them from us will be out of town for two weeks and so we are cat-sitting our cats. Addiston lit up like a Christmas tree when she saw them and even though her 3rd spoken word was kitty she pointed right at leo and said "dog"

I like the middle space that wedges between Away and Home, the few days of reestablishing routine and unraveling the last threads of adrenaline after an adventurous trip while simultaneously regaining footing in the familiar comforts of home.


Sure, it comes with unpacking and recuperation, catching up on mail and household tasks. But it's a place of acute awareness--reflection on both observations of new places and people as well as reminders of the things that draw us home--the grounding, guiding, calming elements from which we come--the foundation of who we are, where we live, what makes us come alive.


The driving force of my passions and inspirations will probably always vascillate between seeing new parts of the world, meeting new people and simply rooting myself deeper into my contentment of home. On every trip, just when I begin to feel gluttonous for more landmarks--more mountains, more beach front walks, more big city symphonies of subway train and skyline, my other self starts longing for home-rainy day quilt cuddling and post bed time trips for frozen yogurt!



I guess it is that life-loving amalgam thing, and I think it's good. Never have it figured out. Never know yourself to the point where there's nothing to contemplate. It is in that middle space between where we've been and where we're going that the best things happen. Away and Home-they are both so important.

We got to visit the daddy at his new office and someone didn't want to say goodbye

vacation

Yesterday morning, as I made a comfortable seat out of sand and positioned myself so I could sip a cold drink, watch the pelicans and still keep an eye on addy who was busy investigating sand mounds beside me, I did what you may have done at the intake of this very sentence. I laughed. Seriously. Seaside drinks? Pelicans? Babies and sand dunes? Ride a unicorn, why don’t you.


We took a long weekend and drove out to Hilton head Island. We were a little aprehensive about taking a vacation, just our little family of three. But we believe in the importance of getting away and experiencing new things. So we planned, we packed, and we went. And boy did it pay off!



My girl loves the ocean. Running into it full force, all but leaping from her daddy's arms to get at it, splashing in the wakes as they threaten to knock her on her little swimmy diaper padded bottom.




We dug out sea shells, climbed lighthouses, and watched the sun rise and set.



And right there I felt that realization of I am small and the World is big. The experience of watching the sun set is humbling and appropriate, everyone needs a reality check once in a while, that the world doesn't revolve around them. I miss the mark so many times when it comes to making plans, but something I always seem to get reminded of when on vacation is to not let my life revolve around the clock, to rise with the sun, enjoy the time that has been given me and then rest, follow the natural rhythm of things. It is good.

We are learning how this works, I think I like it, my little family of three. I feel so very blessed that we were able to take a vacation and that we had a successful one, avoiding sleepless nights and temper-tantrums thrown in hotel lobby's. I'm not saying it was perfect, we may or may not have hid in the bathroom for twenty minutes while Addy was falling asleep, but we went, we relaxed, and I didn't look at a clock the whole time!

Time

So I've started this post half a dozen times and nothing seems to sound right. I write and re-write and read and then frantically jam on the delete button like i'm tapping out the melody to "we will rock you"

This weekend was emotionally draining. It was one of those times when you know that you're doing good, not well-good, but there were growing pains. I had two good friends have two different yet related problems both of which shook me to my core. I hate that I've had to be more grown up than I want to be at times in my life. Unfortunately I've had some not so pleasant experiences, including multiple miscarriages and traces of cancer, but by the grace of God and an understanding, patient, husband I've grown from them. So the last two day's Addiston and I have partaken in a little thing I like to call retail therapy!


There are times when I have no idea what to say-shocked aren't you! But I know that when I was going through a hard time I just wanted someone there beside me. No words were necessary! Sometimes I begged for no words.
My parents were the worst people to be in a tense situation with, my dad hums different show tunes and pop music from the before I was born while my mom makes lists of anything pertinent to the given situation. Then if we are in a doctor's office my dad will pick up one of the falling part children's books and start reading you green egg's and ham as if that will make you feel better when you're being tested for some rare disease!

Wow-tangent, I love you dad!


I believe that the world is full of good people, good things, and good intentions, (like my dad's singing of the andy griffith theme song) I see good every day in the stories I read and people I encounter, and yet I’m privy to the fact that the world has its share of ugly too. I hate that I've been face to face with the ugly in the world and I hate even more that my friends have to as well, the thought of Addiston someday having to experience the pain that our fallen world causes, is unbearable, but as my friend amber said, maybe I had to go through my valley so that I could help her through. You don't tread alone my dear.

I was called strong this weekend, and I was shocked-speechless. Here's a little secret, I feel like the least strong person in the world. Most of the time I have no idea what I'm doing, what I should be doing or if what I am doing, I'm doing right! But I do know fear, I know pain and I know that a smile goes a long way, a prayer goes even further and having someone who can just sit with you when your in pain is a blessing.


*Sorry if this post was confusing or depressing! I'll be more chipper next time!*

Goodnight!

One of those days

Jared started a new job this morning. He was nervous-it was weird, my man doesn't get nervous. He's calm, predictable, collected, controlled. It was strange!

Chick knows where daddy comes from...door to the garage!

Addiston cried for an hour when he left, she was still tired, I tried to get her to nap by driving around the neighborhood-that didn't work, but I did take a little tykes picnic table out of a neighbor's trash (I'm pretty sure I looked crazy with a kids picnic table strapped to the top of my BWM through the sunroof-psh it was FREE, I don't care how I looked!)

We came home and ate breakfast then my girl took to crying and attempted back flips out of my arms, back to the car it was, this time to the grocery store. I got dressed, got Addiston dressed, loaded in the car and decided we were going to the good wal-mart, (there are 2 close to our house, one slightly farther-the good one) we got there, she was asleep, I loaded her in the cart, and realized I had left my purse at home-fail! She woke up while I was re-loading her into the car and didn't fall back asleep through the entire grocery trip!

she did however spill cheerios all over the back seat of my car

Addiston's slept in pretty long the last two days, probably on account that we were in the ER till 1am Friday night-Saturday morning. Addy was clingy and feverish last week and while no mama likes her baby to be sick, I relish the opportunity to be needed, to spoon her warm body a little closer and kiss hot cheeks repeatedly. No worries, we just some IV fluids, she was a lil dehydrated and is doing much better, I'll spare you the tramatizing parts, let's just say I wasn't cut out for sick kids and am feeling oh so BLESSED that my kid is healthy!

Jared and Addy slept in until... drumroll please....NOON on Saturday. I awoke at 9:30 and got to work, I checked on them a few times to make sure they were both still alive but mainly I got stuff done.

So today was one of those days, the one's that you wish you could have a re-do, a go back to bed and start over, with coffee in the house (yeah that was missing this morning too!) and leave out the "oh crap we forgot to put the trash cans out last night" a proper breakfast for the daddy's first day at his downtown job. But tomorrow's another day and if we could have a neighborhood parade throwing candy every Tuesday for no better reason than because the most boring day of the week should be celebrated—well, sign me up. Life is beautiful... even without the coffee.

And can I just tell you that you should be here, where I am right now, sitting on my bed, listening to a daddy make his little girl belly laugh in the tub. It is the most beautiful sound in the world and makes all the terrible horrible no good stuff that happened in the last few days seem like a distant memory! Our girl loves her some bath time!



Happy Monday!