just the two of us

I've started this post probably 10 times: gotten side tracked by laundry, baked cookies, nursed a baby, wasn't feelin' it, tapped the delete button to the rhythm of "we will rock you" and now I concede, the words aren't flowing poetically and I am to the point of just wanting to remember.

Sorry for the lack of eloquence!

I miss my big girl. I've been right here with her, she's been right under my nose (more like my feet) she sticks close these days, making sure she gets as much attention as possible. We try and give her what's due, but as any parent knows when a new baby arrives-it's hard! 

The other day Jared worked from home and while Isabella was taking a milk coma kinda nap I tucked her into a bouncy seat in the den adjacent from Jared's desk and snached up Addiston for a special shopping trip to Target. No agenda, no to-do's, no grocery list. Just shopping-the way it was intended, fun, looking at whatever grabbed your eye. Alone time with my girl-just the two of us.

Sorry for the blurriness of the photos they were taken with my phone at lightening (2 year old) speed.

I told her she could pick any color! She was confused. But we landed on an electric purple.

We're still working on the whole potty training thing-she's opposed right now (something we expected after having a baby) but I told her she could pick out big girl panties, and we purchased some very over priced disney princess undergarments!

We browsed the toys, dollar spot, and then ended up in the new grocery section where we bought bananas and cookie mix for daddy. 

Jared traded me places when we got back home while I fed Isabella and made cookies with Addiston.

 It was good to get away with Addy and just listen to her talk, with no interruptions, not being distracted, and learning more about who she is: shy but spunky, smart, and sweet! She has purple toe nails, and has told that to everyone who will listen! 

ok no sappy wordy ending! I just wanted to remember my day with my girl!

Today's the Day

I've started this post at least three times in the past week but because I have a newborn and a two year old, and get choked up every time I think about it too much I bail out for a bowl of cereal or some laundry.

Addiston starts the Mothers Day Out program at a local church today.

Jared and I went back and fourth about whether or not to put her in one.  It's 4 1/2 hours two days a week. I thought we'd wait another year, but after thinking it through, discussing it more times than we can count and a lot of prayer here we are. I know she'll do great, she's got the learning thing down pat, but she could use a lesson in sharing (classic first child!) and being around kids her age. I'm excited to see where this new journey takes us and can't wait to hear what she has to say at the end of the day.

I know she'll be safe and well taken care of. I love the values her "teacher" has and the fact that she was wearing a bright pink blazer when I first met her. I am lucky to be able to spend alone time with Isabella-something 2nd children don't get enough of. But I'm still struggling with letting Addiston out of my sight. Last night I packed her first lunch, she helped pick out what she wanted to wear and I packed her a little book bag with a spare outfit and a few school essentials.



Three pairs of shoes-because that's what every little girl needs when she has spare room in a backpack!

And every girl needs a pedicure for a big occasion!



Pretty Pink toes



and we're all ready to go



Well at least for now. We'll see how everyone (mainly me) holds up in the morning. I'm still coming down from those crazy pregnancy hormones and Jared is fully prepared for me to cry twice as much as Addy does.

Meeting the Greats & A Wedding

When I say I peeled myself out of bed this morning, I mean I literally had to self-talk my way through every body part that braved its departure from the sheets. My head was slow to the game. Yesterday was Jared's first day back at the office and that has left me feeling pretty exhausted and sore today. 

It's been an eventful week! This time last week I was running around the house in a mad frenzy gathering last minute forgotten items for our road trip to the buckeye state. We loaded our family of four, our luggage and our slue of formal attire in the car and headed North. 


I am undoubtedly a people person. I come alive in airports, on dance floors, crushed between bodies at concerts, in the line to pay at starbucks. I call people in the car on a four-minute drive so I can talk my way from my house to the nearest Publix, and I hug instead of shake hands. It’s not that I don’t like to be alone, I dream of island hammocks and quiet walks around the lake, it's just that the extroverted side of me takes over and I thrive for holiday gatherings, surprise parties, and weddings. 

Jared's little sister got married this weekend (the reason for our trip) and while I am thrilled to have been there and couldn't be happier for her and our new brother-in-law I have to admit I was pretty scared and what could have happened. Traveling with a newborn, and a 2 year old three weeks post-op had me shakin' in my boots. We packed snacks and toys and allowed our phones as back up sources of entertainment, stopped half way at my parents and did everything in our power to appease the flower girl so that she'd make it down the isle-she did, and then slept on my mom's shoulder the entire ceremony.

Sleepy flower girl

I'm realizing I feel better if I get up and out. It helps to wear lipstick and cute shoes, and it helps to know that soon I will feel good/normal, certainly by the time the season shifts, and I can dream of apple pie and baby knits simultaneously. Me and my girls-all dressed up for a very big day!


For all of my worry and fear at what this weekend could have held, it could not have gone better! Isabella got to meet all of her great grandparents. 

My grandmother

And all of Jared's grandparents. His sweet grandma Ella (Isabella's namesake) stole her during the rehearsal dinner and didn't give her up all night! What a blessing to be around family with crazy kinds of baby experience-19 great grandkids!

I didn't get a picture of her with his dad's parents-second child fail!

We are happy to be home now and I've almost caught up with laundry, my house is in the worst state it's been since we've moved in and my husband doesn't know it but Saturday may turn into family cleaning day. I'm still not allowed to pick up Addiston or anything over 10 pounds-because of the c-section, so we're relying on Disney movies and extra snacks to keep things calm. 

Our family of four: 

Sister, Sister

We're slowly finding our groove around the Miller household these days. The help has left and I'm on the mend so we're finding our new routine and getting to know ourselves as a family of four!

Our first family outing was to church on Sunday. After I had Addiston I was perfectly content to hole up in the house for 6 weeks only leaving to go to doctor's appointments. This time around after about 5 days home I started to go stir crazy. I was a rebel and talked Jared into letting me go to church (3 days before I was suppose to leave the house) I needed out and it was good for my soul to be in service and to introduce our newest addition to our amazing church family!

Yes we all 4 coordinate, we always do when we go to church but I have a feeling it gets exponentially harder with each family member added. (not to mention the fact that Jared only owns 2 pink shirts)

Isabella is two weeks old today and to us it's been obvious from the moment we saw her that she looks just like her big sister. I was ecstatic about this little tid-bit. I have three sisters and while I look as if I could be related to one of them I always envied those that you could without a shadow of a doubt tell were siblings! Isabella was born exactly 1 pound lighter than Addiston and besides filling out a little the only noticeable difference is that her hair isn't quite as long.

An hour after birth


Hospital picture

(yes I made sure they wore the same outfit-I just love the pink ruffles!)

Headed home


In the little time we've had with two girls we've already had fun dressing them alike. I know that my time in doing this is limited! I HATE my childhood pictures where I'm wearing the exact same outfit as my siblings. I don't mind coordinating and looking like a family but everyone wearing the same thing is only cute on the very young-and unknowing!




I know they can't wear these individually! They remind me of my grandma. She used to tell all of her children, and grandchildren that we were her favorite-in private of course as to not let on to the others of her game. We all thought that we were her pride and joy until one day we wised up and put the pieces together.

Well thats it for now. I'll be back soon to update about our adventures with 2 girls but for now I need rest and a drink of water!

Isabella Grace-A Birth Story

It brings me to tears to try and express the miracles that have occurred in our lives these last few days! She is here! She is perfect. She has changed me. She is everything I never knew I always wanted!

Wednesday morning came just as it should have, like any other day, Addiston woke us up. My parents were here and we all sat around the kitchen table as I made pancakes-that I wasn't allowed to eat. We took longer showers than we usually would, knowing they would be the last of their kind, and got ready to head to the hospital.

Last shot as a family of 3!


Ready to be a big sister!


Jared and I spent a little time alone with Addy and we all prayed together for Isabella and myself before we had to leave for the hospital. We got the hospital in true fashion-20 minutes late! We were ushered through the regulatory processes of gowns, vitals, and pre-op procedures. After the commotion died down Jared and I had a little down time to ourselves before they wheeled me back.



We talked about our fears of adding another baby to the mix, and making sure we balance time between both girls. I expressed my fears of undergoing major surgery and we prayed for peace, safety and a healthy girl.

We headed back to the OR and Jared sat in the hall while I became a floating head.



I had worked tediously on a birthing playlist when I had Addiston and subtly tweaked it for Isabella's birth. Little did I know that the doctor gets to pick the music in the OR and Isabella was born to a bluegrass mix from none other than steve martin's band. (father of the bride is my favorite movie so it could have been worse) I had 2 of the same nurses this stay as I did with Addiston as well as the same anesthesiologist. And can I just say that after 14 hours of hard labor with Addiston, Tom-the anesthesiologist looked like a knight in shining armor, this time when he walked in my room a little voice in my head said-what were you thinking?!?

20 minutes into surgery she was born, She is Perfect. Weighing in at 7lbs, 2 oz and measuring 20 inches long, she was bigger than I thought she would be considering how sick I was this pregnancy and that she was born 6 days before her due date. When they were taking her out the doctor exclaimed "woah, look at that cord" nothing else was said and I didn't think much of it. Later I was told that the umbilical cord was wrapped around Isabella's neck twice. Thank the Lord for a scheduled necessary c-section!

The first time I got to see my girl.



The hardest part for me of having c-section babies is that when they are born they are taken away. She was quickly passed over my head, wiped down and I was allowed to kiss her forehead and let my tears fall from my cheek to her shoulder. However I believe that God knows what he's doing and that my sweet, shy, husband needs this alone time with his girls before I swoop in and hog them. Its a beautiful thing to witness, Jared falling in love with his daughters.

Jared and Isabella were escorted to the nursery for a more thorough inspection and I spent the rest of the surgery, about an hour praying and thanking God for another miracle baby and a healthy one at that. I can't believe that I am so blessed as to have 2 perfect, healthy girls, when 5 years ago doctors questioned my ability to have children at all.

Roughly and hour after she was born I got to hold her for the first time.



I spent some time in tears of joy while Jared told me how perfect she was and how beautiful we both were. We both were so overwhelmed with joy that things had gone smoothly! After a bit Jared went to the waiting room to fetch the big sister who was waiting with my family.



Addiston loves her little sister, she exclaimed "Isabella came out to see you" and was thrilled that we let her hold the baby.  The rest of the family came in, to meet her and then rather quickly left so that I could nurse and recover from being sliced in half.

I am so thankful for God's grace and goodness to us and blessing us with our girls.  He knew exactly what I needed when pairing me with Jared, that he is the perfect daddy to our girls and exactly what I need. It was just the three of us, alone in quiet, Jared and I amazed and grateful for our girl. Her tiny perfect features, and her beauty.